A Sneak Peek Behind the Scenes of Board Meeting Preparation.
Taking a train into London during the rush hour, I overheard a conversation about today’s board meeting at Megacorp, and more specifically, what kind of sandwiches each board director requires. Huge attention to detail, many different requirements. The giver of the information knew everything there was to know, she had clearly done this many times before, and duly passed it on, name by name, sandwich by sandwich. Without missing a beat.
Joe: Cheese and Pickle. Debbie: Ham. Peter: Prawn….etc etc.
One of the Directors is called Nick, and the chat about him really caught my attention. Apparently he doesn’t like lettuce, and if you get him a sandwich with lettuce in it, he really complains about it. Really complains.
Poor Nick, I really feel for that guy. Fancy going to all the trouble of being paid to attend your own board meeting, only to find that someone might bring you lunch with *shudder* lettuce in it. Imagine that happening. Imagine the humility of having to pick the lettuce out in front of your fellow Directors, you’d lose all respect, wouldn’t you? No wonder he really complains.
I get off the train at this point and leave all the high level stuff behind me. Whilst it was great to get a brief insight into the strategic planning behind a board meeting, I confess things were getting too exciting for a mere worker like me.
Before my attention drifted to what sandwich I might want for my own lunch (note to self, I need to recruit a sandwich advisor), two thoughts flashed across my mind. The first was this: If the board’s sandwich requirements are so utterly predictable, what might that tell us about the rest of the meeting? Board meeting? More like bored meeting. And second, I can’t help but feel that the world might be a better place if once in a while, we told people like Nick to go and get the sandwiches.
I first published a version of this post on Medium back in 2015. I was inspired to revisit it after reading this excellent piece titled Minutes, Meetings and Minutiae, by Gemma Dale, which challenges that persistent behaviour whereby women are so often expected to take the minutes, get the sandwiches, etc.