work – Page 10 – The Consulting Artist

An Open Heart And A Curious Mind

Last week I had the absolute privilege to be back among friends in Ohio for the 42nd annual State HR Conference. I really felt I needed to be there. Why? Apart from the powerful draw of being with friends and the drive to continue to fulfil my conversation with Dad, I felt I owed Ohio. Two years ago I was hugely fortunate to be at the conference for my first time and I had a terrible journey over. Long story short, my flight plans fell apart and I arrived just before I was due to talk having not slept for over 34 hours. People were very kind to me and I got a lot of support but when you look and feel like this:

It’s hard to give your best, and my best is what I expect of myself.

So – 2014 rolls around and I get another shot. This time I facilitated a workshop and talk on Art for Work’s Sake, and gave two talks with some opportunities for interaction, on collaboration. I approached each session with my usual mix of nerves and excitement, and something else besides. I couldn’t put my finger on it in the moment, and whatever it was, it took us on a more adventurous path than I had anticipated. Conversations flowed, experiments were carried out, people talked and people laughed. I’m a big fan of making a conference session as adaptable, as flowing as possible but even so, the nature of this work seemed to push on that edge more than usual.

I’m my own worst critic but a lot of people spoke with me after the sessions and said they were enjoyable because I’d helped them think a little differently. As each year passes, I become more convinced that most good things in life and work are the result of little, incremental differences – so I appreciate feedback like this. I also had a chat with my friend Erin and when I acknowledged that I beat up on myself, she asked ‘Do you care what other people think about you?’ I thought and answered, ‘Yes, I guess so’. Erin replied, ‘What other people think of you is none of your damned business! You do the best you can, and if that makes a difference, even to just one person, that should be enough.’ That observation rattled around in my head as I returned back to the UK.

On my return home, I wrote an edition of my occasional newsletter. In it I observed the importance of people looking up and offering to be of use to one another – little incremental differences. When I write these newsletters, I often get a couple of replies. This time I got a few more than usual, and with the permission of the writers, I’d like to share a couple.

Leah Sprenger wrote back to me:

Hello Doug!

I sat in both of your seminars at the Ohio HR Conference last week! It was wonderful to hear you talk and I love the idea of looking at things with a more creative mind…that is something I definitely wanted to bring back to Crown Battery (in Fremont, Ohio) so I decided to purchase the book of cards “Stop Doing Dumb Things” and have them on my desk. When an employee (we have about 500) comes in & asks about them – I ask them to draw a card, and what they do with it from there is up to them.

I wanted to share with you one of the results. It’s something this employee sat in my office for about 5 minutes doing – It seems like a long time – but during that time we had good conversation and some laughs. It got him to be creative in his own way – trying to make a face with a limited amount of lines. I enjoyed the fact that he played along – and I actually think he enjoyed the change of pace. After he left my office – he stopped right back in because he forgot to do what he actually came in to do the first time! SUCCESS!

I just want to say THANK YOU for taking time out of your busy schedule to come to Ohio and share your knowledge!

What a lovely note to write. Thanks Leah – I love your approach and I’m grateful to you for sharing. I also heard from Jackie Lewis:

Good Morning Doug,

I must tell you that I am so very pleased to hear from you. I attended your classes and I don’t know if you remember, but I am the girl who you dubbed as being in “Tea Land” after you had us do our sketching session. I still chuckle about that when I think about it.

I want to tell you that my heart was touched deeply when you spoke of your father. I wanted to get up and go give you a hug, when you spoke about your dad’s passing. (I lost my dad unexpected last year as well)….so I understand your deep emotions and the ache it leaves inside. It was an honor that you shared that with all of us in the class, and many were so moved by your story.

As you went on with your presentation, I was really pulled in by your outlook on life, by your perspectives on things, and just your overall kind, caring, genuine and down to earth character.

I was so impressed by the way you used your God given talents of being an artist and a musician, and interwove those in to your teachings in the classes. Because of that, I learned so much from you. I was hoping to win one of your pieces of artwork, I liked the simplicity in the ones you showed us, and I thought that was such a great gift that you gave to those participating, by handing them one of your pieces. Just so unique and memorable.

I just want you to know I think you were a top notch speaker and I am so pleased I got to meet you and attend your classes. You made an impact in my life.

Thank you

Wow! Thank you Jackie. She and I have since exchanged further notes and Jackie’s feedback and generosity is heartwarming. And here I am now, reflecting on these wonderful recent times, which also include some fantastic work here in London with a lovely, increasingly curious team of people, who are exploring ways to work better together. In that work, just as in Ohio, I’m becoming conscious of the need to balance a solid, well researched approach with that nebulous sense that doing the right thing for the right reason is….right. Coincidentally, Neil Morrison shared this lovely talk by Nicholas Christakis on Facebook yesterday, which compellingly blends the importance of data and social, ‘facts’ and feelings. Maybe this stuff has just always been there, hiding in plain sight?

So why am I sharing these thoughts and feedback with you? Well – I think it’s because after a bazillion years, it is finally dawning on me that the best I can do, for others and myself is offer an open heart and a curious mind. And perhaps I’ve been approaching my work like this for some time and just not felt comfortable to say so? I don’t know. This combination feels risky, and it often hurts, but when it is mixed with a ton of preparation, and it coincides with other open hearts and curious minds – it is rather wonderful.

I hope you will forgive the indulgence of including Leah and Jackie’s notes in this post, and I hope that you too will be the beneficiary of a little, incremental difference today. And if you are, I’ll wager it’s because you’ve already given something little, incremental and worthwhile.

Look Up

For all you TLDR freaks, this post is about the importance of lifting your eyes from your immediate work in order to scan wider, and see how you might be of greater use to those around you.

I took part in my first and only timed running race last week in Ohio at the annual State HR Conference. The race started at 7am and I woke at 6am to head out on a mission to get some shorts to run in. I drove to the Sandusky Walmart and in I went. My first time in a Walmart – this place is huge! The clock is ticking – I need to find shorts and all I can see is fruit, vegetables, hair dryers and kid’s toys. I’m all lost in the supermarket. Luckily – my lost look attracts a member of staff and in no time I’m shown to where the shirts are, I grab a pair, thank the man and leave. In case you are interested, I ran the race in 27 minutes, 22 seconds, and I also found a few moments to stop and take this photo of the sun coming up over Sandusky.

In Cleveland Airport the following day I’m wandering about looking for a place to sit down and work. A policeman comes up to me, ‘Excuse me sir, you look lost. Anything I can help with?’ He shows me the way to a quiet place where I get some work done.

Two busy people, yet both are present in their own situations, noticing what’s going on around them, and then there’s me, the fortunate beneficiary. It’s hard to be present. Busyness can be all encompassing, and yet I benefitted from two small interventions – two nudges that helped me get back on track. I hope you get the chance to look up from your work and offer to be of use to someone today.

A version of this post went out in my newsletter a few days ago, and the responses to it have been plentiful and generous – much more so than usual. Thanks to Niall Gavin for the excellent title suggestion for this post. And thanks also go to Angel Rivas, who I met in Ohio. He got in touch to say this:

Hello Doug,

It was a pleasure meeting you and taking in your session on collaboration at the Ohio SHRM conference. I contributed to the conversation and you presented me with Roy Lichtenstein’s Sunrise artwork and I just wanted to thank you for that.

After taking in your session I started to think about your experience in Wal-Mart and wanted to share something that has helped me in my professional career. To start I will give you a little background on myself, I am prior service and served as a Psychological Operations Specialist in Iraq. When I am not in uniform I am a recruiter and have worked across the spectrum on what I have recruited for, mainly high level security clearance candidates that are only allowed to have vague resumes and talk in code. With that said, one thing that has helped me is advice given to me when I first started recruiting for a government contract agency.

I was having a hard time trying to find candidates for a certain opening and it was showing, my attitude changed, my posture, my overall presence was just poor. Similar to your experience in Wal-mart and the airport, a colleague noticed the change and spoke to me about everything that was going on and what my issues were. Once he heard me ramble on he looked at me and said “Angel, you just need to get a win today”. As he went on he explained that my problems are there because I let them beat me and told me that if I look at life and find a “win” then that will be enough to say I contributed to moving forward in my life. So since then I have woke up every day with the intention of getting a “win” sometimes it is small, like getting a free cookie at lunch, other times it is like winning the Super Bowl… Or World Cup (to keep it worldly). I know you are busy and wish you safe travels, I just wanted to share my story on how playing for a win, even a small win can help change a persons day.

Safe Travels

In writing this today I am conscious of two shortcomings that happened yesterday. In the morning I walked straight past someone struggling with a heavy bag on a flight of stairs. The person behind me stopped and offered assistance. I didn’t look up, the person behind me did. In the evening I nearly bowled a friend over on London Bridge as I walked speedily, with my head down in a rush to catch a train. I didn’t see him, but he saw me and got in my way so we could stop, look up and briefly talk. I still made the train easily.

It’s hard to be present, busyness can be all encompassing. I hope you get the chance to look up from your work and offer to be of use to someone today.

Slowly Waking

For all you lovely busy people suffering from TLDR (Too Long Didn’t Read), this post is mostly about resisting the temptation to rush everything. You may now get your head back down and charge off to your next meeting. The rest of us might choose to read on…

The past couple of weeks have been a wonderfully paced return to work, after a thoroughly relaxing three week family adventure around France. I didn’t plan to have such a rhythm in my return to work, but I think it’s been hugely helpful. A couple of days into this reawakening I scribbled this note on Facebook:

‘My body is back from holiday. I fully expect my brain, heart and soul to join it sometime in the next few days…’

My friend Heather Bussing responded with this:

‘It happens that way to protect you from the shock. And because there really isn’t a rush, despite the insistence otherwise. If everything came back with your body, the cognitive dissonance could cause instantaneous human combustion. Relax. Your life depends on it.’

Heather knows her stuff, so I’ve tried as best I can to follow her advice. In the time between then and now, I’ve reflected a couple of times on the importance of the stories behind numbers and data, and it seems to me that we tend to jump towards, and cling to the figures because they’re immediate. Instantly convincing. We are 46% more in a rush than this time last year, and therefore 82.9% more likely to believe this, or something.

I took the opportunity to attend the first day of Learning Live this week. It’s rare for me to simply attend an event. I’m often running workshops, speaking and/or writing, and in this period of reawakening it was absolutely lovely to be among people enthusiastic about learning and development, and only be expected to soak up as little or as much as I wanted.

I chose to listen to Owen Ferguson speak about the importance of agile methodology in L&D. Owen spoke from the perspective of the product development part of his business. Here’s what Wikipedia has to say about agile, and here’s The Agile Manifesto (copied from the Wikipedia page and used in Owen’s talk:

‘We are uncovering better ways of developing software by doing it and helping others do it. Through this work we have come to value:

Individuals and interactions over Processes and tools
Working software over Comprehensive documentation
Customer collaboration over Contract negotiation
Responding to change over Following a plan

That is, while there is value in the items on the right, we value the items on the left more.’

I found the talk interesting and I think there’s more to be done in exploring how to use agile methodology in the more behavioural side of L&D, as well as in the development of product.

I chose to listen to Sukh Pabial talk and facilitate conversations about being your best self at work. I enjoyed the cocreative aspects of the session and I’ve asked Sukh if I can incorporate a couple of his ideas into my own session on collaboration over in Ohio next week.

I chose to converse with many smart people at the event – too many to mention. I chose to go to the dinner in the evening, and enjoyed wonderful conversations through many chance meetings. I even chose to help write a song before we sat down to dinner, thankfully – it was beautifully sung, by Alex Watson, not me!

I’m now ready to switch up a gear and change my cadence again, which is a good job as there’s much work that needs doing! Times like this are great fun and for most of us, they aren’t sustainable. Much like Neil Morrison wrote about recently, times like this are often at the expense of something else. You could, with sufficient justification I’m sure, say I’ve missed out on things by coming back more slowly than usual. My body came back from holiday a while back, and my brain, heart and should have finally joined it. I’m delighted they chose to take their time.