Employee engagement for maximum value

Here at What Goes Around Industries we run eight small factories on our estate. Every spring we induct a whole new raft of potential into each factory. Our new people mean everything to us. We provide an encouraging supportive environment for them to develop and grow.

In the first few weeks with us the work is hard, and not everyone is cut out for it. Those who choose to disengage are sent on their way with a happy smile, no retribution here.

Through the summer we allow our employees lots of time to relax. We want them to be the very best they can be so whilst we’re there to help if required, we prefer to let our people self determine. A few more leave us and that’s fine. Those who stay grow together, and strengthen our business immeasurably.

Autumn comes. It’s annual appraisal time and by now our employees are bright, shining and strong. We meet them all and apply a vigorous selection process before sending them on the final stage of their journey with us. It’s time to represent.

A Happy Employee

How do we get the most out of our people? First we disembowel them and then we put their remains to the sword.

A Disembowelled Employee

Next we literally put them through the grinder before finally squeezing the very life out of them.

Factory Equipment

We believe we are a model of excellent employee engagement. We get fantastic results. 100% customer and shareholder satisfaction and we’ve never once had an employee complain. Never.

Creating Maximum Value

How do you get the most out of your people?


Author: Doug Shaw

Artist and Consultant. Embracing uncertainty, sketching myself into existence. Helping people do things differently, through an artistic lens.

8 thoughts on “Employee engagement for maximum value”

  1. Don’t forget the ones who don’t make the grade – windfall. Left by the curbside to be picked up by whomever can use them. They may be bruised but it’s the giving that counts!

    1. Thanks for the reminder David. Trust me, we forget no one. Some folk get eaten and all unused employees retire gracefully down at the compost heap 🙂

      1. I’m in danger of getting metaphysical… Are we all just apples on the tree Doug? Is it OK to mature in the sun only to be juiced in our prime? Or composted because of some blemish not of our making? I’ll stop now!

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