Experiments in Wellbeing – Meditation

Meditation. Noun, often used by tree huggers as an excuse for sitting around and not doing any work. Get a job you slacker.

Love and Peace

I used to think meditation was a waste of time, and I held this point of view despite never having tried it. As part of carrying out the 100HappyDays experiment, I began to appreciate the positive impact of slowing down enough, each and every day, to spot something that prompted happiness in me. I became conscious that in order to do this – I needed to let go of many distractions and thoughts, just long enough to spot and record whatever it was that made a difference that day.

I really enjoyed 100HappyDays, and the small change in behaviour I needed to make in order to complete it (79% of people who start the experiment fail to complete it – many citing ‘too busy’ as their excuse), so as I continued with my wellbeing experiment, I decided to get over myself and my negative thoughts, and expand on that slowing down and letting go sensation. It’s time to give meditation a try.

I chose Headspace as a tool to help me meditate, and I’ve been using it for almost 300 consecutive days now. Here’s a little of what I am experiencing.

What Makes A Habit?

I didn’t want to experiment with this half heartedly, I felt that would be making it too easy for the cynic in me which had dismissed the idea so strongly without every having tried it. Yet before I started with meditation, I wondered: how will I manage to find the time to do it every day? Turns out – it’s easy. You just do it. Whatever you decide is important – you will make time for. ‘I’m too busy’ simply means ‘this is not important enough to me right now’, and I am currently not too busy to meditate.

Having got this far, and whilst acknowledging that I’m probably being gamed by the Headspace app (complete xxx consecutive days and get a cookie), I’m curious to see if I can keep this daily practice of meditation up every day for a year. I haven’t yet found the answer to the question, ‘What makes a habit?’ and the longer I continue with this practice, the less interested I am to find out. What I am learning is that when you turn up every day to practice something, things start to change. I don’t think I am getting any ‘better’ at meditation as such, but I do think other things are getting better as a result of this reposted practice.

Distraction

Distraction is everywhere. Even as I thought about how to begin to write these sentences, I popped over to Facebook, just in case anyone had posted anything interesting since the last time I looked, about ten minutes ago. I’ve always had a niggling conviction that I am easily distracted, and through meditation, I’ve begun to experience just how widespread and unhelpful that distraction can be at times. Having had my suspicions about distraction confirmed, I am in a better position to deal with them.

Acceptance

I frequently experience things such as loneliness, frustration, anger, sadness. I frequently experience things such as joy, humour and love too, yet for some reason I wrestle with the negative side of my mixed feelings more than the positive. You can’t have one without the other – I’ve always known that, yet I can struggle to accept the flow of these conflicting and contradictory thoughts and feelings. Through meditation I am learning to accept. Accept myself, accept and even enjoy the conflict which previously bothered me.

Other Stuff

I’m becoming increasingly mindful of the impact I have on others around me and I’m seeking to involve them in my thoughts, and how I can benefit them from being more mindful. I’m learning to go gently. Julie Drybrough recently tweeted a very touching memorial to her late father on the anniversary of his death – in it she used the words going gently. Her short, sweet tribute moved me and I’ve since been more aware of incorporating going gently into my practice. I want to move away from using Headspace and manage my meditation on my own for a while. It’s been incredibly useful, and it can be flaky at times. Waiting 25 minutes to get the day’s session to download is not always conducive to the act of meditating!

More to follow…some day.

Half Way To The Hundred

Some of you might remember that at the beginning of December, I shared my early thoughts on my experience of #100HappyDays. 100 Happy Days is a simple commitment to share a photo of something that makes you (or in this case, me) happy, every day for 100 consecutive days. Here’s what I noticed when I first wrote, after day 14:

Happiness is indeed elusive, and when found, best left to purr quietly in the background. Don’t make a fuss or it’s likely to move on again.
Experiences trump things.
Family and friends – when they’re happy, you are more likely to be too.
Belgian Beer is lovely, but on a Monday night, maybe not so much.

Today is day 50 for me – I’m half way to the hundred. Here are a few of the photos in my collection, taken around Christmas time. If you click the image it will take you to my Instagram feed where I’m keeping the photos.

100 Happy Days Snapshot

The challenge of finding something that makes you happy each and every day is proving interesting, particularly on days when I don’t feel particularly happy. For example – I had a bout of manflu in the run up to Christmas and had to resort to a photo of slippers, tissues and packets of cold remedies one day!

Having got half way to the hundred, I am now less surprised that so few (only around a quarter) of the people who start this challenge, finish it. Keeping stuff going is tough, and I know I often set out to achieve things that fall by the wayside. Do I feel happier as a result of this experiment? I feel like my mood has lightened overall across the time invested so far, and I am starting to enjoy an occasional quick flick through the photo album as well as continuing to contribute to it. I am currently mindful to turn the experiment into a hard copy photo album if I can find a suitable, inexpensive way of doing it.

I’m currently working on a number of regular, repeatable ideas with a general wellbeing theme, in support of my small things make a big difference philosophy – and this is one of them. Keep on Running is another, and although that experiment concluded on New Year’s Day when I walked my 111th mile over 36 consecutive days, it has now folded into something new, more on that soon. I’m not yet sure where all this is taking me, and I am sure that I’m learning a lot and enjoying most of it.

Happy Friday to you.